Dad took Waldo instead of me. Laura: Steve, I can't talk now. urkel-steve. "If I were a stop light I'd turn red every time you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.". Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: That's what I said, but Dad still said no. Carl: [Urkel Voice] In the meantime, I have to break the news to Harriette. Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Oh man I didn't think you were this cool. The bad news is, he'll charge you an arm and a leg. The nuptuals have developed a slight snafu. [after Carl comes out of the busted transformation chamber in an Urkel like fashion, due to Myra's tampering]. When the door opens Carl appears dessed up as Steve normally dresses with his glasses]. Rachel Crawford: Mother Winslow, when you when you Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Bite the big one? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I'll have you know, I'm not in Italy. Your dad's runnin' late. Eddie Winslow, front and center! Old money has more wrinkles! It's not fair. Laura Lee Winslow: [in tears] Daddy, everything's a mess! Gun, Carl. If you were a vegetable, you'd be a 'cute-cumber.'. Excuse me Waldo, is there something written on your arm? Laura Lee Winslow: [comes in with Mother Winslow's dress from the dry cleaners] Ugh mom, this place is really getting gross. Steve Urkel: [while Laura and Maxine hit Steve with two Boston Cream Pies] No, AAH!, WAAAH! [Eddie agrees as Mother Winslow and Harriette walks out of the living room]. Carl Otis Winslow: Like that. Steve Urkel: All right! Rachel Crawford: Mother Winslow, guess what? Harriette: What's goin' on down here and why do I smell cinnamon flavored smoke? Willie Fuffner: That's different, you're my friend. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Waldo! Harriette Winslow: What's wrong with that? You know that? next semester, are ya? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Why are you upset, Waldo? Lt. Murtaugh: They're sending in that Urkel kid. Steve Urkel: Could. Harriette Winslow: Carl, those are my personal and private thoughts. It's either a number or a letter! Carl: Oh, you heard me, don't ever come back. Stefan Urkelle: Where did you learn all that? Having aired 215 episodes, Family Matters is ranked third, behind only Tyler Perry's House of Payne (254), and The Jeffersons (253). In the latter half of Family Matters, Steve started staying with the Winslows as his parents didn't want him around. Cassie Lynn: Becky Sue! Carl Otis Winslow: 150 extra people on what should've been a small family affair. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Stevil was back and he was coming for my soul! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I call Waldo Faldo up. Laura Lee Winslow: Grandma, you're not old. Carl Otis Winslow: Oh nothing, never mind! Laura Lee Winslow: Most people don't know that. "Tomorrow Dad!" Rachel Crawford: Harriette, we've got to talk. You are under arrest! 'Steve Urkel' Actor Jaleel White Launches Purple Urkle - Forbes You're always sorry. Laura and Judy, divide up the rest between Barbie doll fans and Lego lovers and get them upstairs too! I probably had the heater up on high and they wilted. Harriette Winslow: Why? I can teach you how to cook. Steve Urkel: I had my first allergy attack when I was nine. Robber: Oh yeah? No. Laura: Remember when you tried to teach me how to sew? Rachel Crawford: Well, I'm planning dinner for a very, very special friend. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Can it be a 976 number? Judy: Were all of Dad's friends named Darnelle? I got fifty bucks on the Knicks. Stefan Urkelle: Well, it could be a few days, or weeks, or [Steve voice] any minute now! Harriette Winslow: [Waldo crashes his snowmobile in the Winslows' living room] Waldo? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Get lost, Laura! So, if I tell him I don't remember him, I'll look like a jerk and I still won't remember him. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [voiceover, as Johnny Danger] So there I was, staring death right in the face. Steve Urkel: Laura's got the highly infectious mucus-nasal-osis-inflamicus. Steve Urkel: Oh, nothing. Steve Urkel: But, I told you. Carl Otis Winslow: That boy is Looney Tunes. Why would anybody want to kill her? Rachel Crawford: Steve, did it ever occur to you that when the door is closed we're trying to keep unwanted people out? Laura: Steve, did you eat that moldy cheese? Get down from there! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Laura, I know that I'm not worthy of you, but I just can't help loving you. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [driving off] Would you relax, Steve? Judge Vance: All right, young man, call your first witness. Carl Otis Winslow: There was an E.Coli scale in the chocolate and I tasted a few to make sure the box was safe. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: Then how 'bout a nice juicy thigh? Well let me tell you something sir, if that's the kind of boss you are. Urkel pronouns are the best. Willie Fuffner: [Wipes his own mouth] Thank you. [goes to the refrigerator] No root beer? Harriette: Yep, they were yelling at each other and bumping bellies. I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. But, you're a teacher, Ms. Steuben, and a daaarrn good one. Harriette Winslow: Honey, that's not true. If you cut me, do I not cough? Stefan Urkelle: Oh no, I didn't shut off the machine on time. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Rachel Crawfish? Laura: Yeah, every time I used the bug spray. Harriette: [sobbing] Clint is driving off and Meryl will never see him again! The next minute rump roast! Come here. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Oh they love the new me. Harriette Winslow: [Rachel carries on about how sad it is Aunt Clotilda died] She was 94 years old. I've had more food than this stuck in between my teeth. Halawna, Oneisha: [pop up in the car Clarence stole] Surprise! "Take out the trash, Edward." Carl: [after kicking Steve out of the house] And don't you ever come back! Eddie: [chuckling] I know this one! A small gastronomic goof up. And I know that baseball card meant a lot to you. And sometimes I was sorry I ever started the whole thing, but I didn't quit. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel. A spin-off of Perfect Strangers, the series revolves around the Winslow family, a middle-class African American family living in Chicago, Illinois. Harriette Winslow: I simply put out his cigar. What's up? This wire will be connected to this cord and this cord is not plugged in. And, he's got something that he didn't have before. Would you care to heal them with a kiss? His relationship with Eddie was usually better than with Carl and Laura. [Stefan tries to stop the chamber and the chamber ends up being busted. Steve Urkel: Sh-she touched me, Carl! Laura: Well, that's because you have self-confidence. Laura: Wait a second. He's gonna drive us tonight. Carl Otis Winslow: I understand that. Some Sorry looking roses that are 3 hours away from potpourri. THIS? The Urkel mock will think bigger in potential screw-ups for teams that have valued assets poorly in the past than for teams that have made few mistakes. It's late. Steve Urkel: Laura? Laura Lee Winslow: Yeah, but only for one month. So long! Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. Curtis Williams: Laura, great timing. Carl: Steve, will you please stop sulking and come out of the bathroom? An illustration of a person's head and chest. Or was it yellow? I'm a person, and I have feelings, and I demand to be treated with respect and dignity! Laura Lee Winslow: Let's just take that risk. You know you'll never reach it, but you have to keep trying. He's half-Nerd, Half-Carl. What are you? Colonel Dirk Urkel! Eddo. The Its PurpL logo features the young mug of White as Steve Urkel, with his signature Coke-bottle spectacles and high-top fade haircut that blends into a purple haze riding above the floating. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: I demand satisfaction. Steve Urkel: I've never tried out for athletics before and the equipment list says that every guy should wear a cup. And you got LOUDER every time you made the Maitre D move us to another table. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Oh that's sweet, what did he say? I wanna read it to my mom. You've got twenty-four hours to drop out of the race or we publish the picture. An illustration of a horizontal line over an up pointing arrow. Carl Otis Winslow: I didn't bring my gun. Harriette Winslow: Did I embarrass you, Carl? Steve Urkel: Now, relax, Eddie. Should I be getting some Handi-Wipes? Undaunted, Steve switches the station to polka music and ends up having a good time dancing with Waldo and Maxine], Carl: By the way, thanks for letting me use your chamber, Stefan. I mean, you are very Laura: Let's just put it this way You have the perfect face for your head. Was it fair that you stood your father up for bowling? Come here, let me give you some sugar. They misspelled three words. Remember you wished that Steve could find out what's it like to be you. Steve Urkel: My Blood pressure. Steve Urkel: Well, Laura, do you realize what you're asking? My parents play this with me all the time! Rachel Crawford: Sort of an Urkel Exchange Program? Yesterday he said 'get lost, Fido Face!' Steve Urkel: You know what, Laura? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: No no no no no. Laura Lee Winslow: Then she demanded her money back when she found out that she modeled ladies underwear. Steve Urkel: Oh, why not? Waldo: Man, they didn't even know who we were. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Aww that's cute. The Battle of Pickup Lines: Part 1 || STEVE HARVEY - YouTube Our limo awaits. Laura Lee Winslow: No it wasn't. I mean the guy's a feeb. And what about the car show last Saturday? 2023. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's that? 4 Mar. But our little town only had ONE library, and it was for whites only. Laura: Curtis, I got my hair done, my nails. Laura: Where did you get the money for this? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Listen, Melissa may not be a cover girl. Waldo: Sure you have. Harriette Winslow: And I always mark the year, you gave it to me. So go ahead, FIRE ME! He heads downstairs to confront Steve]. When is that party supposed to be. Carl Otis Winslow: Tell me Harriet, before I left for work this morning, did I or did I not tell Edward to empty the trash can? Boyd Higgins: Name's Boyd Higgins, but ym friends call me Buck! Laura: I was thinking about taking a home economics class so I can learn how to cook. He acts like a gangster, gangsters hate cops. Dexter Thornhill: [after being found guilty at Urkel's trial] Darn you Urkel, Darn you to Heck! Now you're going to find out what it's like to be Steve Urkel. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [nervous laughter] Great Wedding, huh dad. There's a lot of bad pickup lines out there. This library card is proof that ONE person can make a difference. Laura Lee Winslow: O.k. Verbs are our friends. He breaks something a beaker along the way]. Steve Urkel: But, I've been practicing and my progress is impressive, even if I do say so myself. Dont you know when you make a mistake, you fess up to it. Laura Lee Winslow: He didn't need to. You have the right to have an attorney present. He's never used his! Carl Otis Winslow: Hey sweetheart, how about some pie? Seems I'm having all the luck. Am is a verb, verbs are our friends. Laura Lee Winslow: If you're really my guardian angel, where're your wings and your harp? Eddie: I just did the laundry and I'm on my way out to wash the car and cut the grass. Carl Otis Winslow: Yeah, bring me a slice. Laura Lee Winslow: If you have to ask, pass. How did you know? Harriette Winslow: You have to understand, back in Detroit where he's from, the police are considered the enemy, so he doesn't trust them. So they picked up all our stuff and moved us. You understand? Carl Otis Winslow: I'm not finished yet. Steve Urkel: Now that Waldo's out of the picture, does that make me your number one reject? Then we par-tay, see no problem. *You're* gonna sleep in the bathtub! Does that about cover it? Laura Lee Winslow: No, it's the whole school! Laura: Steve, you like this kind of music? 1. Steve Urkel: No state your name not name your state. Eddie: No, Kyle's gone solo and Jerry went with him. I can't think of a single reason not to do this every week. People just love juicy gossip! I feel stupid! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: It's a tradition in the Urkel family to not consummate the marriage for three months. More like The Repulsions. Laura: She didn't need a hairstylist, she needs a fairy godmother! Got anything in the fridge? Ms. Steuben: [after seeing Waldo's assignment] Waldo, this is superior work. But I recognized him right away. Rachel Crawford: Yeah do you want to be buried or cremated? [Notices Maxine & Laura left the living room] Well, I thought it was a good story. Urkel actor Jaleel White is launching his own cannabis brand | CNN Business Eddie: As a starting forward of the school team, it's my duty to play round ball not nerd ball. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Well, how did you miss it? Steve Urkel: Well, what if you trip or something? And I know that baseball card meant a lot to you. I just wish it would all go away, Daddy. Carl Otis Winslow: I'll tell you what son, why not give me cash for Christmas. Steve Urkel: Well, that may be what happened, but it won't be what the people believe. Carl Otis Winslow: [fishing for the catch of a party Eddie wants to go to] Are his parents going to be there? Carl: I'll tell you what's sad Harriette, I've watched two full hours of the "Bridges Of Madison County" and Clint didn't blow up one bridge! Harriette Winslow: Yeah. We've got cheerleaders taller than him. Waldo Geraldo Faldo, Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Cheating? Waldo: Life is short, and so it Gary Coleman. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Waldo heads into the kitchen as Steve emerges] You o.k., Eddo? You're so beautiful, you take their breath away. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: State your name. Who? And, my God, look what you've done to Waldo. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Oh, cool. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: But you humilate me everyday. Steve Urkel: Practice. Waldo: I said he Hey, you can't trick me! So one day I decided to do something about it. Steve Urkel: Well, look at his poor, pathetic face. Wha? no. Then Urkel shows up with Eddie and Carl and the crowd cheers for him]. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: As long as you're up, bring me a piece. Laura: Doth thou love me? Rodney Beckett: [after seeing Eddie's music video] I can't believe it. Laura: I do want a guy with something upstairs, but, uh, I also want a well-built staircase. Instead of cool, it was set on Nerd. 'Steve Urkel' actor launches cannabis brand on 4/20 Steve Urkel: I bought two tickets to a concert that Laura wants to go to and offered to take her as my, get this, date! Steve Urkel: [Pointing to the floor] Him. The Steve Urkel NFL Draft Preview | Football Outsiders Weel Good Lord man, she's an overnight success story. Join. Allison: Look, we're just having a little harmless fun. But, I'd be willing to pay you. I can't live like this. Laura Lee Winslow: First you better sprout a chest. I love this lady [Laura] and I can come over here anytime I want to and you can't stop me! Steve Urkel: [opens the back door] Surprise. Laura: Yeah. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Yeah, well you have to get rid of them. So, is it all right with you? I wanna play some of my own records on the jukebox, but I don't know how to put them in. When my dad said you fixed me up with Laura; why, I thought I'd wet my pants! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [shocked] And he brought hooters! "No mo giet itsu mana! Steve Urkel: Don't feel bad. Earlier Urkel's Funny Moments - YouTube Carl Otis Winslow: [furious] Edward is in jail. [just got lemon tart filling thrown at him]. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Allison, is that true? I'm being born! Stefan Urquelle: You can take a bus or an airplane. Can you help me out? This is my mother. Carl: Typical. Her temperature shot up and she tossed more cookies than the Keebler elf. Laura Lee Winslow: [as Laura Wigglesworth, pointing a gun at Johnny] The narration to finish! then removes his hand]. [Waldo has just given Eddie a list of IOU at Mighty Weenie]. Carl Otis Winslow: I told him I was taking him over to see you. Carl: Stefan, you gotta help me. In Season 1 he was a supporting character and made his first appearance as a background character in Rachel's First Date and had his first major role in "Laura's First Date", however as of Season 2 he was officially considered a main character . Laura: Sure. We're getting dirty looks from old people! Steve Urkel: Well, the earth didn't exactly move for me either! SUBSCRIBE to get the latest. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What the heck is wrong with you? Steven Quincy Urkel (generally known as Steve Urkel or just simply Urkel) is a fictional character on the ABC/CBS sitcom, Family Matters, who was portrayed by Jaleel White. Carl Otis Winslow: Yes, Harriette! Steve Urkel: Ready, my sweet? T-Pain says Kanye West stole one of his lines after calling it - REVOLT Laura: [running in] Guess what? Steve Urkel: I have a lot of personal experience in first aid. Sure, it may cover your hiney, but if you make a habit of it, you've got a serious problem. Rachel Crawford: It's almost impossible to find a job these days. You know, I was exposed to this sort of thing when I was growing up, but I always hoped it would be different for my kids.
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